Echoes.

Every so often running at the back of my mind during those sleepless nights a name would always enter my mind so it isn't surprising that it has once again proceeded to enter my though process tonight.

Ah Alyssa what an impact you made on my life when I first met you at age 13 despite living in different continents. 

You and I would spend hours picking each others brains apart and exchange things we should read, watch and listen to I accredit my love of Beethoven and the reading of both the Iliad and The Odyssey to you as well as many of my interests today. A lot of my views on society and people were formed because of you, you helped me get through some rough patches ( Looking at you 2007).

You were an intelligent and wonderful person and you would have truly made something of your life. It still saddens me to this day that you passed away only a few years ago more so because you were struck down at such a young age, you didn't even get to see your 20th birthday. 

All those memories of gaming,music, literature and philosophy with you I will always cherish. I promise one day I will read Paradise Lost just as you suggest. 

May you rest in peace.

#1 Crush

I've learnt a lot these past two years on the topics of love, lust an relationships. You see the three are not always one in the same allow me to explain my sentiments. 

Love: Love can be pure, love can be beautiful  however love corrupts, love obscures and love blinds. One can be in love without lusting and obviously without being in a relationship. It can be pure such as platonic and it can be distorted and dangerous when other factors and immense negative feelings are attached to the loss of it or lack of it in return.

Some people are not phased by it while others can be brought to immense psychological harm and/or physical harm by it. Don't get my wrong I might be talking about it in a negative light but I have nothing against love, I have just seen and experienced what happens when someone allows it to consume them in a negative light.

Lust: Now this is a fun one isn't it? Problems that associate with lust can be seen much faster than those with love and can be just as devastating however it's different. There is a reason why it is considered one of the deadly sins and that is because it is dangerous, crimes of passion are usually associated with love and lust. People who seek out relationships founded on lust soon discover their relationship was superficial and will burn brightly before petering out soon after. Lust combined with a fragile and unstable mind in love is a very dangerous combination. Lust changes into a more pure form while under the influence of a good healthy relationship. ''Nothing wrong with lust, just don't delude yourself into thinking there is mutual love in the scenario'' 

Relationships: Firstly I want to say any relationship where one person is in the relationship for the sake of it or out of fear of being alone will fail. I say that with experience. It can be hard for some people and it can take others a long time to learn it but fear of being alone is a very dangerous mindset. A wise man once told me '' Do not seek your happiness in someone else if you can't find it within yourself''.

Relationships can be founded without lust and or love entering the equation however I will be talking about intimate relationships. Relationships need meaning and they need purpose without these they will quickly fade away and die this is the crux of the matter, if a relationship doesn't have these things it just becomes a mutual lust which will burn out, or in turn just denigrate into meaningless puppy love that will just crash and burn. 

''Hold the person that you love closely if they're next to you. The one you love, not the person that'll simply have sex with you''.

Just a rant I had to get off my chest I probably could have written more but I can't articulate my thoughts. 

What is in a name?

As many of my friends would know I use the alias ''Aliquem'' a lot. I find the history behind the name rather interesting though. At age 16 while trying to find a name that would fit my Warlock on WoW I randomly wrote in ''Aliquem'', which to my delight sounded good and seemed to suite the whole dark arts sorcerer.

Fast forward a few years later and a friend points out that ''Aliquem'' is the Latin translation for ''Someone''. Something I rather liked and something I find myself pondering about often, why did my 16 year old self pick that word? Maybe I heard it once before and it stuck in my subconscious. As many of you might know, I am not the most sociable of people but the beauty of the name Aliquem is it provides anonymity however people always want to know someone, they always want to ask someone for advice, someone intrigues you.

So I ask you, what is in a name?

-Aliquem.